You’re right that I am not deeply involved in issues of gender, though I can understand being/growing up nonbinary/transgendered/gender-fluid/etc. in a culture that seems to only understand/reward the male/female binary would be very difficult, especially in certain parts of the world. The Armand post (about whether he might be androgynous and/or agender) got a good number of Likes, but most importantly, @jeffer-sin‘s comment (”i’m agender/genderfluid and i totally agree with this post thank you”) confirmed that I

answered it sensitively, as I always strive to do, especially with topics like these.

Re: Misgendering Eli, I feel like this is a headcanon discrepancy between us. Your points serve to convince you that she is not female, but they do not convince me. As always, #your headcanon may vary, so please do not take my opinion as law. Even an author can’t force an idea on their readers; people still ask AR whether Nicolas and Lestat were gay lovers! Some people clearly have a different headcanon than the author, but their headcanon is still valid.

This Wiki post describes the issue of Eli’s gender: “The original film ultimately leaves the character’s gender ambiguous, as the scene showing Eli’s scarred genitalia is not explained. …In the 2010 film it is quite clear that Abby was born female…” 

One of your points was the “I’m not a girl" scene. ^This is the one from the original film and I interpreted that line of dialogue as meaning that Eli is not human. In context, Eli seems not to know what a “girlfriend” is, or what “going steady” entails (even though Eli is centuries-old, maybe this is feigning ignorance for Oskar), so roadblocking Oskar from a romantic (maybe sexual) relationship seems a little premature. Oskar is 12 and I don’t remember him ever pressuring her in a sexual way, again, no reason for Eli to roadblock him against a romantic/sexual relationship at this time. Once Eli has an understanding of what “going steady” means, the moment ends with Eli agreeing to “go steady” and holding Oskar’s hand as they fall asleep. This little bit of tenderness may not fall under “romantic” in the traditional sense of the word, but it seemed like a sign of love and care which had nothing to do with gender. But that’s my own interpretation.

You mention Eli’s genital mutilation, but that is not explained in the films. From what I’ve read of the book, the character is referred to with female pronouns until the ritual castration is revealed, and then the character is referred to with male pronouns. It is up to every reader’s interpretation to determine gender of the character at any point.

I’m sorry that we disagree on this, and I understand that some people might not headcanon Eli as female. This is a blog that is here to highlight a certain fandom and is focused on entertainment, and where I do my best to keep it politically-neutral, fair-minded, and civil. That is my prerogative on my own blog.

If anyone is interested in more headcanons and interpretations, check out the links below. I am sure there are many many more, but these are good for a start:

• David Lowery, a blogger, has a brief but good review addressing the gender issues.
• Let-me-in.wikia 
• Wikipedia