"I don’t like myself, you know. I love myself, of course, I’m
committed to myself till my dying day. But I don’t like myself.“ – Lestat, Memnoch the Devil

In context, Lestat’s saying this to Dora, and she doesn’t really address it. He’ll do this occasionally, verbally toss out some bit of raw self-reflection and it goes dismissed or ignored by whoever is with him at the time, but we as readers grasp it and hold onto it bc we know he’s just given us something valuable! 

TL;DR: Lestat is a survivor of a lot of crap which has made him somewhat bitter and underdeveloped in some areas, but he takes all the negativity he experiences and uses it as fuel towards a more productive purpose. This makes life worth living for him, and it’s one of the major reasons why those of us who love him, love him ❤

I think Lestat’s admitting something powerful here, that yes, he’s flawed, to the point of being truly unlikable. His family treated him like crap for most of his childhood, and he had to give himself all the positive attention that they wouldn’t. He parented himself for the most part, so he understandably has issues asking for and accepting affection. He had to build up his ego from the very little positive attention he got. Much of that famous bravado he displays is a performance, but he’s been doing it so long and so well that he’s usually able to convince himself it’s authentic. 

He knows he can be a bastard, most of that is a defense mechanism against being hurt further. People have tried to kill him on more than one occasion! It’s one thing for enemies to try to kill you, but it really hurts when the ppl you love try to kill you.

He’s a survivor of child abuse (the beatings from his father and brothers whenever he tried to improve his life), neglect (his mother was not very motherly to say the least), was abandoned as a fledgling vampire (and @vampchronfic suggests in a recent fic that the bond between maker and fledgling is deeper than I had previously considered in the form of a physiological bond) and he had to figure everything out on his own – including whether he could survive making a vampire companion,… I could go on, but it depends on where canon stops for you. He parented himself as a vampire, too. 

So why be devoted to himself? Even though he was an innocent victim of all this abuse and neglect, when he was mortal, he became the provider for his family. He was the one who could hunt and he literally put food on the table. He was the one who had to save the village from the wolves. So I think it’s deeply ingrained in him to take all the negativity he experiences and use it as fuel towards a more productive purpose. Hunting was something he was praised for, but more importantly, the act itself gave him pleasure, asserting control over nature in this way. Every kill was something earned. 

He carried this through to vampiring immediately, choosing to hunt the evildoer, taking them down brings him the same good feelings that hunting for his family and protecting the village did. 

Occasionally he does still kill innocents, and he does hurt those he loves. He has issues with consent and accepting affection. Deep down, he does love ppl and wants love in return. He’s definitely at a better place now than when we first met him in IWTV.