spamtastiic:

emeralds-are-love:

sixpenceee:

sow-cean:

mrs-jamie-wellerstein:

sixpenceeeblog:

“You can’t love someone else if you don’t love yourself first.”, I know plenty of people who deeply and romantically care about a person but don’t quite like themselves all too much. But what I find is that their relationships tend to be problematic. For example, they may settle for abusive relationships because they don’t think they’re deserving of more. Or they may take out their insecurities on their partner making it an unhealthy relationship.

EXACTLY. If you don’t love yourself, you won’t respect yourself enough to be in a good relationship because you don’t think you deserve it.

Or you think what you have is all anyone will ever be willing to give you.

A couple points I thought were important

• ofcourse, this isn’t the case for every single person in the world. relationships are more complicated than that, but research has shown again and again how low self esteem effects relationships for the worse and also just the quality of your life for the worse. here’s an interesting book on that. I notice a lot of people with healthy relationships with low self-esteem feel like they’re undeserving of it and that in of itself is problematic.
• self-love isn’t the same as narcissism. they are two vastly different things. self-love also isn’t about facials and pampering yourself. it’s about learning to accept who you are as a human being. it’s about quieting the inner critic inside of you and realizing that you are worthy and deserving of good things in life. here’s a website that maybe helpful
• NO just because you can’t seem to love yourself doesn’t mean that you will never find a good partner. Not at all. It just means that perhaps you should work on yourself first and find happiness in your own company before seeking it out from someone else. We can’t control how other people behave and will find ourselves disappointed more often than not if we rely on external sources. Afterall, one of the paradoxes in life is that you find the perfect person when you are happily single. 

Reblog again for the list of facts.

THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT