Armand’s “Burn Book” Chapter Insults (TVA, Part 2, Chapter 16)

punkrockaryastark:

Lestat

  • “Had thrown over custom and
    respectability and any hope of court ambitions, of which he had none anyway since he
    couldn’t even read or write, and was too insulting to wait on any King or Queen, who
    became a wild blond-haired celebrity of the boulevard gutter theatricals, a lover of
    men and women, a laughing happy-go-lucky blindly ambitious self-loving genius of
    sorts.”
  • “[Louis’] cocky insolent maker”
  • “Comprising everything you could ever possibly want to know about him
    and some of us.”
  • “The most bold and disregarding dusty vagabond
    on occasion, loner, wanderer, heart-breaker and wise guy, dubbed the “Brat Prince”
    by my old Master-yes, imagine it, my Marius, yes, my Marius, who did indeed
    survive the torches of the Roman Coven-dubbed by Marius the “Brat Prince,” though
    in whose Court and by whose Divine Right and whose Royal Blood I should like to
    know.”
  • “Almost destroyed the world.”
  • “Maddening and fascinating and intolerably annoying,”
  • “So much for him.”

Louis

  • “He remained with me because he had to do it. It was the only way that he could go on
    existing, and for death he has never had the courage, and never will.”
  • “Very human,
    weak, having lived only two hundred years, unable to read minds, or to levitate, or to
    spellbind others except inadvertently, which can be hilarious, an immortal with whom
    mortals fall in love.”
  • “Easy to
    track and easy to abandon,”  

  • “Will not make others after his tragic blunders
    with vampiric children,”
  • “Dusty Louis”

Claudia

  • “Who among us is going to let me be silent on the
    matter of Claudia, the child vampire whom I am accused for all time by all of having
    destroyed?”
  • “I never loved her. I didn’t know how.”

Daniel

  • “Sometimes an intolerable nuisance,”
  • “Equipped with my powerful blood, he can contend with
    any who should be foolish enough to interrupt his plans for an evening, a month or a
    year, but he cannot contend with my continuous company, and I cannot contend with
    his.”

Gabrielle

  • “Gabrielle. She’s around now.”
  • “Everyone hates her.”
  • “Abandons [Lestat] for centuries, and somehow doesn’t
    manage to heed Lestat’s periodic and inevitable frantic cries for help, which though
    she could not receive them, being his fledgling, could certainly learn of them from
    other vampiric minds which are on fire with the news round the world when Lestat is
    in trouble.”
  • “A vampire so cunning and cold that she has forgotten what it ever meant
    to be human or in pain. Indeed, I think she forgot overnight, if she ever knew it.”
  • “Something more akin
    to a prehistoric reptile than a human.”
  • “Gabrielle, virtually useless to anyone but herself. Some night
    she’ll say something to someone, I suppose.”

Pandora

  • “I don’t know her.”
  • “Seems
    too beautiful to hurt anyone.”
  • “She seems harmless.”

Santino

  • “Silent and without apology for the credos
    he had stuffed down my throat in the year 1500 before I was sent north to Paris.” 
  • “He says nothing to anyone.”
  • “He looks at me silently
    as if we never talked together of theology and mysticism, as if he never broke my
    happiness, burnt my youth to cinders, drove my Maker into century-long
    convalescence, divided me from all comfort.”

  • “At times he looks shrewd and even hateful.”
  • “Where he actually lives, and when he will surface,
    nobody knows.”
  • “We keep a gentlemanly distance from
    one another.”

Marius

  • “It is like a glacier between us,”
  • “Neither microscopes nor
    computers shake his faith in the infinite, though his once solemn charges-Those Who
    Must Be Kept, who held such promise of redemptive meaning-have long been toppled
    from their archaic thrones.”
  • “Enough of him.”

David

  • “Assaulted by
    your closest of friends, the loving monster, the vampire who would have you as his
    fellow traveler in eternity whether or not you gave him leave,”
  • “You dress with high
    vanity”
  • “You look at me as though your
    curiosity will put me off guard, when nothing of the sort is true.”
  • “Hurt me and I’ll destroy you. I don’t care how strong you are, or what blood Lestat
    gave you. I know more than you do.”
  • “Because I show you my pain, I do not of
    necessity love you.” 

TLDR: What Armand thinks of everyone

  • Lestat: Dumb asshole that nearly killed everyone.
  • Louis: Weak and can’t do anything, bless his heart.
  • Claudia: No one will shut up about how I killed Claudia. Yeah, I mutilated her, but she needed to go.
  • Daniel: I can’t stand him anymore.
  • Gabrielle: Useless cold-hearted reptile bitch that everyone hates.
  • Pandora: Seems pretty chill and harmless?
  • Santino: Destroyed my entire life and acts as if nothing ever happened. Rude.
  • Marius: Acts so perfect, actually isn’t.
  • David: I will not hesitate to fucking annihilate you cause you’re nothing compared to me.

Now tell me Armand isn’t the saltiest vampire out of the coven….

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[X] (This had to be done eventually…) for @whatwedointheshadows

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VC – Truth Hurts by Eeba-ism

Reposted with permission from the original artist, @eeba-ism

Relevant bc of this recent post about VC vampires and mimicry [X]

sanguinivora:

monstersinthecosmos:

jj-justwriteit:

lestatthewolfkiller:

redversaillesrose:

sanguinivora:

Canon: Vampires are good at mimicry.

Headcanon: They can mimic each other.

Ubercanon: Armand can do a SPOT ON Lestat.

Okay but like.

By that logic, Lestat can do a SPOT ON Marius.

i imagine louis does a pretty spot on lestat too although no one knows it, but one day he does it in front of everyone and they’re all just staring at him bc they thought he was ~above~ all of this lol

Marius can only do a spot on Marius

I mean let’s be fair to Marius, he can probably do an amazing Enkil.

Wouldn’t you just, like, sit very still? For millenia?

(only Khayman can judge Marius’ Enkil impression but he never does)(bc Khayman is a cinnamon roll)(Khayman’s impressions suck but are very charming anyway)

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moral-cipher:

rose gold: colour board for armand and bianca (for @perladivenezia)

theamazingdrunk:

Lost Photographs from Daniel’s Missing Luggage, or,

Glimpses of an Unlife

I’m taking stupid photos at SFO when all the televisions flash red for breaking news. Jeez, I think, another bombing or political scandal. We’re being warned about graphic footage. Huh. New York’s getting two more inches of snowWell, that sucks.

I must be dreaming, because his face—that’s Armand’s face on the screen! 

This is wrong. 

The footage is shaky and I can feel the panic threading its way through my body as I watch, helpless, when he screams something at the plaza. Even though I don’t know what’s going on, I know it’s him. It’s the way his hair curls when there’s snow on it, and it’s when—it’s wh—

New York’s getting two more inches of snow and, and they won’t—everyone is staring at me. Everyone, and they—it’s just two more inches of snow in New York. Have I fucked up? Did someone see my fangs—New York’s getting two more inches of snow and the footage keeps looping. I’m being yanked backwards and someone’s shoved me onto my knees and the floor slams into my jaw and suddenly I hear screaming. 

It’s me. I’m screaming. Daniel Molloy is now screaming at Gate 7. Daniel Molloy is now screaming at Gate 7. They’re cuffing me and I can’t—

“FUCKING—TURN IT OFF!” I scream at them in ugly, gulping sobs, and someone gags me with a leather strap and one of them figures it out and tries to call on his walkie talkie but they won’t turn me away I can’t look away that’s not what he’s supposed to look like he doesn’t like the cold but now he’s burning.

…anyway, that’s where this photo’s from.

dm.

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danielmolloyy:

––––––––   daniel malloy

Accio Inevitability –  StellaMachiavelli – Vampire Chronicles

stellamachiavelliici:

Thanks everyone for engaging with this! I loooove reading your own theories and headcanons on HP!VC.

Again, credit where it is due to @sangcreole for the wonderful headcanon post which started this.

Accio Inevitability –  StellaMachiavelli – Vampire Chronicles