I mean…you have to start somewhere. Just get your name out there, recognize people, get recognized, and then interact more with the people you like?? I’ve been here two years now and this is what I did and do. It’s really not much more complicated than that.
It might help to realize that we’re all just giant nerds who like to talk about norse bros fucking and no one will think you’re being annoying when you try to put yourself out there! Like, yes, come yell with us!
Ok so I have more thoughts. This is actually something that maybe I’ve learned with age? And I’m saying you do this personally, anon, this just kind of general advice for a general “you”, but… You can’t simply…exist somewhere and expect to have people notice you or make friends. You can’t go to a party and sit against the wall looking lonely and not talking and expect to meet people. You can’t even just stand there in a group of people laughing and nodding. You have to make an effort! You have to say hi, and be friendly, and add your thoughts, and ask people about their thoughts…and if you ever want to see them again after that party you have to make it happen. And sure, maybe you might get turned down? But if you don’t try, the answer is always no. I know this is hard. It is! It’s really hard! It’s nerve wracking to put yourself out there like that! And to keep doing it! But the thing to realize is that most people are pretty friendly, and if you DO screw up your courage and put yourself out there, USUALLY good things happen.
Also, this is my personal invitation to anyone who’s ever wanted to talk to me and hasn’t…please do! I love making new friends! But I can’t be your friend unless I know who you are! ❤
Tag Archives: advice
Dear longfic writers
- If you sometimes feel like it was pure, ridiculous hubris that you ever started a story that would take so much work and persistence to finish, I promise you, you’re not alone.
- If you feel like you’ve already been writing forever and the “good bits” are still ages away, you’re not alone.
- If you’ve been stuck for days or weeks or longer because you know what happens later but you don’t know what happens next, you’re not alone.
- If you’re desperate to squeal about your beloved OTP but you feel like you can’t, because spoilers, and it’s driving you nuts, you’re not alone.
- If you feel like you’ll never finish and you’re bound to fuck it up somehow, you’re not alone.
- If you wonder if you’ve sabotaged yourself because who’s going to click through to a 28 chapter WIP, you’re not alone.
- If you feel like you’ve been pouring your life into a single story for ages and will be for ages still and you don’t know why anymore because hardly anyone seems to care, you’re not alone.
- If you can hardly even plan the further-away parts of the story or even think about them because thinking about them reminds you how absurdly far you still have to go and you get massive anxiety, please believe me. You are not alone.
Dear longfic writers
- I fucking live for your work. Like I love me a little one-shot or a medium-length fic but srsly give me that 100k+ (200k? 300k? yes pls) goodness.
- I am constantly in awe of your ability to stick with your story, to keep your plot moving and your characters’ relationships developing like just damn.
- I don’t judge if your updates are erratic. If you’re worried about too much time passing between updates, just know that I and so many others squeal with joy when we get that subscriber notification in our inboxes.
- There is literally nothing more glorious than watching characters develop through a long-ass fic. Relationships, friendships, character growth? Sometimes after I’ve finished a longfic or I’ve gotten to the last update I’ll go back and reread the first couple chapters just to see how far my babies have come.
- If you stop updating your fic for whatever reason, that’s okay. We as readers are just lucky to have been graced with your story as long as you chose to write it. You’ve been gifting us with time and effort for this long and we appreciate it.
- As someone who has had multiple longfic ideas and either (1) got through two chapters and gave up or (2) was too overwhelmed by how much work it would take to actually write, you are my literal superheroes.
- You are brave and persistent and creative and a gift to fandom, and if you ever need a pep talk I am here to love on you.
Yes. All of this. God bless writers of longfic, you’ve been helping me survive winter for years now.
This. 😢
Bless this post 📚📖
@vesperlionheart @sariasprincy @thefreckledone @beyondthemoor @katlou303 I love and appreciate all of hard work you guys put in your fics!! I’m a huge fan!
Can you just give some general relationship advice? You’re the most romantic vampire I’ve ever seen <3
If you’ve ever read my books, you know I maintain relationships merely because I’ve been lucky enough to find people who don’t throw me away when I reveal myself to be a complete and utter disaster who will sabotage everything we have if given half the chance. I’m a terrible person to give relationship advice.
So here, based on my own failings:
-Say you’re sorry. Mean it.
-But don’t say it all the time.
-Seriously, it loses all meaning.
-Even if you ARE sorry.
-No, sex with that other person isn’t worth it. Yes, I see how good looking they are. Trust me.
-Find ways to show love: notes, trinkets, kisses. Something to show that they are on your mind.
-But not gifts you’d rather just have for yourself, you idiot.
-Don’t buy them a house unless they asked for one.
-Don’t trick them into having children with you because you are afraid they’ll leave you.
-Don’t entrap them.
-Seriously, that one is never going to turn out the way you hope it will.
-Tell the truth. Even when it makes you look terrible.
-Trust them. Yes, especially when you don’t want to trust anyone.
-Tell them the things that scare you about yourself. If they are who you think they are, they can hold them for you.
-Know that they love you, even when they are so angry at you that they can’t bear to look at you.
-Say I love you. Yes, it’s going to hurt. Do it anyway.
“You forgot the most important point.
Allow yourself be loved. No matter how wretched and undeserving you feel.”
“” It is quite possible to leave your home for a walk in the early morning air and return a different person – beguiled, enchanted. “”
—
Mary Ellen Chase
Tomorrow.
(via mortalhusk)
“One of the simplest ways to make the audience like a character is to show him liking other people. One of the easiest ways to make the audience care about a character is to show him caring about other people. We care about Harry Potter in no small part because he cares so much about his friends. It’s impossible to imagine Harry seeing Hermione get hurt and feeling anything but horror and guilt, no matter how terrible a fight they might have had beforehand. Katniss is by design a more prickly and “difficult” protagonist than Harry is, or than Moss seems intended to be, but we care about her from the start because we see how deeply she loves her sister and her willingness to sacrifice herself to protect her. Bad writers, though, often make the mistake of thinking that you make a character likable by showing that other characters like him, and make the audience care about him by showing that other characters care about him. This tends to have exactly the opposite effect. At a certain point the reader starts to wonder what’s so great about this guy that everyone is showering him with praise, and starts actively wanting to see him fail or be told off.”
— https://fail-fandomanon.dreamwidth.org/325399.html?thread=1869956375#cmt1869956375
(via pitviperofdoom)Someone send this to Anne Rice
Maybe someone told her and that’s why Lestat is in love with every character in the VC who doesn’t actively try to kill him.
Literally Anyone: Hello
Earlier-canon Lestat: *judges them* What a pleasure it must be for you to be in my presence.
vs.
Literally Anyone: Hello
Later-canon Lestat: *attack hugs them* You haven’t tried to kill me yet I love you so much you must love me im sure you do love me say you love me back yea gods I’m so overwhelmed I’ve never felt this way before I love you I love you I love you…
I want to make something clear real quick
my goal isn’t to make anyone think exactly the same way I do. i want you to think for yourself.
don’t swallow my posts wholesale w/out thinking. don’t swallow what fandom policers say wholesale w/out thinking. don’t parrot other people without thinking.
ask yourself if people are being honest before believing them
think about the words people use. ‘always’, ‘all’, ‘never’ and ‘nobody’ are absolutes; in reality, there’s almost always exceptions to the rule.
generalizations are not always trustworthy & can’t be applied to individuals. (that might be a generalization about generalizations.)
there are abusers who call themselves shippers. there are abusers who call themselves anti-pedophilia/incest/abuse. there are abusers who ship pairings you consider abusive and abusers who ship only the fluffy, safe pairings. abusers can use anything to abuse, so don’t believe people who say ‘my space is abuser-free.’ (it isn’t.)
it’s easy to get turned around and thrown off by people who argue dishonestly. if they can’t answer simple questions about their position, you should probably ask somebody else who knows more.
shaming and guilting are not arguments. people who try to shame or guilt you into agreeing with them are not treating you kindly. be cautious about listening to them.
talk to people you trust. get blog recs; read different arguments & come to your own conclusions. know where you stand and why you stand there. know that it’s not wrong to change your mind if new evidence persuades you.
and know that you never have to tell anyone what you conclude if you don’t want to. that’s your business. you don’t have anything to prove to me or anyone else.
I just want everyone to have confidence in their ability to think for themselves and do what’s best for themselves – and not just in fandom. in everything. and I think that learning how to draw your own conclusions is the best way to protect yourself from being used or abused by someone trying to force their ideals down your throat.
No offense i didnt spend my entire childhood being made fun of for my interests, fear judgement all the way through my teens and early adulthood, and learn to love what i love free of shame so I could be made to feel bad for enjoying something harmless because “the fandom ruined it/made it cringey”
if you’re going to urge people to think critically about the media they consume, you must accept that they might do that and come to a different conclusion to you.
the phrase ‘think critically…’ all too often comes with an unspoken assumption of ‘…and you’ll adopt my opinion, which is the right one’ which is both arrogant and contrary to the initial suggestion.
let people come to their own conclusions. you don’t have to adopt, support, or even like them but you should respect them.
(also stop assuming that people haven’t already ~thought critically~ about the media they consume before you deigned to show up. condescending intellectual elitism is not a good look.)
Relationships get so bananas when you start deciphering the other person’s love language.
Like I thought I was just acquaintances with this person because they never told me details about themselves and we just talked movies and writing . But then they made time to have coffee with me and they showed up out of breath because they ran. Like. RAN to be on time for coffee with me?
And I was like “i don’t mind waiting” cause I never want to run
But they said they wanted every minute they could get because I’m so busy usually
Which is when it clicked that I didn’t get how much they considered me a friend because I just straight away didn’t see MY signs of affection in them and went “cool! Casual buds it is.” But now that I’m seeing their signs of affection, I feel a little silly for dismissing them like that even though I felt like we could be best bros.
Anyway, some people show affection through time or intensity or commitment and not vocally. I really have to remember that!
Fyi- just in case you didn’t know.
TOUCH got a bro that likes to give high fives? Back slaps? Are they a hugger? Do they not blink an eye at cuddles?
QUALITY TIME this bro will (as op stated) sprint to spend every minute possible with you. Every second that you guys are together is a declaration of affection.
WORDS does your bro tell you how amazing and great and fantastic and wonderful you are all the time? Guess what…?
GIFTS do they buy you coffee? Snacks, energy drinks, spot you at the restaurant? Did that one key chain removed you of them? Ding ding!
ACTS are they always doing things for you? Ie: Nah bro, I got this, I can do that, need me to get anything for you, I can help with…?
PRO TIP – The way people show love is often how they receive love as well.
I reblogged this recently but it got better and ive been thinking and learning a lot abt love languages so
I-want-my-IWTV 