“A long-term study of children
raised by lesbians found that these children were less likely
to suffer from physical and sexual abuse than were their peers
who were raised by heterosexuals. This is thought to be due to
the absence of adult heterosexual men in the households (Gartrell,
Bos, & Goldberg, 2010). Girls raised by
lesbians tend to have higher self-esteem, show more maturity
and tolerance than their peers, and are older when they have
their first heterosexual contact (Gartrell et al., 2005, 2010). Children
raised by same-sex parents seem to be less constrained by
traditional gender roles; boys are less aggressive, and girls are
more inclined to consider nontraditional careers, such as doctor,
lawyer, or engineer (Gartrell et al., 2005; Stacey & Biblarz,
2001). Over the course of more than 20 years, scientists studied
the psychological adjustment of 78 teenagers who were raised by lesbian mothers. Compared to age-matched counterparts raised
by heterosexual parents, these adolescents were rated higher
in social, academic, and total competence, and lower in social
problems, rule-breaking, aggression, and externalizing problem
behavior (Gartrell & Bos, 2010).
There are fewer studies of children raised by two men, but gay
fathers are more likely than straight fathers to put their children
before their career, to make big changes in their lives to accommodate
a child, and to strengthen bonds with their extended families
after becoming fathers (Bergman, Rubio, Green, & Padrone,
2010).”
~ Martha Rosenthal, Human Sexuality: From Cells to Society, p.247.TAKE THAT HOMOPHOBIC HELLENS
Tag Archives: parenting
Sorry for inconveniencing you. But I’m been I honestly not sure how to say this, Louis and Lestat. But basically my dad keeps trying to contact me and just when I thought he changed he hasn’t, I don’t know what I should do. I’m lucky to have a had full of friends and a great mother (she’s fabulous like you Lestat). I just feel like my voice isn’t being heard but I don’t want to go off on him. What should I do? Si vous plait, and thank you. ♡ lots of love
♛It’s no inconvenience, Louis and I have both experienced our share of bad parenting, and done some of it ourselves, so we’re glad to reach out and help when we can.
We read your message many times and can’t quite unravel what the issue is, but the fact that you have a mother who you feel is fabulous (and I assume you mean in her personality, more than just the contents of her closet *winks), and some friends for support, that’s a good start.
Some people really shouldn’t be parents, others are wonderful at it… it took Louis and I plenty of trial and error to figure it out ourselves. It sounds like your parents may not be working together on it themselves.
As badly as my father treated me, I took him in when the roles were reversed. He needed care, and only then, with his defenses down, were we able to have some of the communication I never got to have with him as a child. Perhaps he didn’t like children, didn’t see them as people, but as animals that needed taming. Louis’ mother seemed perpetually disappointed in Louis, no matter how hard he tried to please her. Perhaps she was disappointed with her lot in life and scapegoated her misery onto him.
It may be that your father doesn’t deserve to be part of your life. It may be that you still have something to resolve with him, like I did with my father. Follow your instincts, and seek advice from your mother. She knew him before you were born, she may have the guidance you seek.
It’s a sad truth that your father will be dead, and there will come a time when you won’t have the chance to try to communicate with him ever again. If it’s too painful to be alone with him, have it be in a setting with others involved, or at least nearby.
I-want-my-IWTV 
