
A lizard seen sleeping in a rose. Photo by Megan Hixson.

Bitch I’m crazy about roses. Roses in face masks, in hand lotions, dried rose petals in essential oils. Rose candles, roses between teeth or a whole bouquet of them pressed into my breasts or roses in the street that have been walked on, run over or flung at someone’s face. Rose tea, rose lemonade, rose lipstick, a rose in your hair, his lapel. Roses dead, roses vivid red. Petals leading from the doorway to the bedroom, rubbed like crayons into the sheets. I love roses so much I took five minutes out of my day to write this like???
♛Darling, you are good enough *embraces gently* Do we criticize a rose as it begins to bloom? No! You are a work in progress. Do not give others your permission to drag you down or crush your spirit, if that’s what they’re really doing. I’ve been there, I can recog
Of course, sometimes, that’s not what they’re doing. They might actually have something valuable to offer, but when there are so many voices, or it’s the heat of the moment, it feels so unbearably stifling. I know.
Failure is a part of life. I fail more than I succeed, even in things I’ve put an incredible amount of effort into. Some things can’t be achieved on effort alone, some can’t be achieved at all. Some require different tactics. Each failure is a chance to lay it all out and strategize, whether to keep aiming for that goal, and if so, what steps might better achieve it. Perhaps advice from others is needed, perhaps not.
Whether these people in your life are right or wrong, I’ve always found nourishment of spirit in inspiration. Seek out that which inspires you and consume it, let it nourish you in the face of negativity. Is it music? Art? Fashion? An indulgent bubble bath with candles and a good book? Do it.
As for your beauty:

“How to describe what humans look like to us! … you can’t imagine what it’s like for us to look on living flesh. There are those billions of colors and tiny configurations of movement, yes, that make up a living creature on whom we concentrate.
But the radiance mingles totally with the carnal scent. Beautiful, that’s what any human being is to us, if we stop to consider it, even the old and the diseased, the downtrodden that one doesn’t really “see” in the street. They are all like that, like flowers ever in the process of opening, butterflies ever unfolding out of the cocoon.” (TVL)
You are in my thoughts, anon, and I hope you found some strength in my words. If anyone finds you less than beautiful, that is their own limited view of beauty.
//ooc; As introspective as he can be, I don’t think Lestat is necessarily the best at giving advice on this subject, and then, my own headcanon of him will vary from other Lestats. My Lestat doesn’t like to get down deeply into emotional details (which is why he didn’t address your specific examples, which I will address in an ooc post). Other Lestats are welcome to add to this, but you might want to ask them separately, too.
Also, I’m just another blogger sharing my own experience, and I wouldn’t want to mislead you, I don’t know your situation and I am not trained in life coaching. If you are having real issues, please seek a professional, a guidance counselor or therapist, etc.