Awww, @wicked-felina and I are happy to have done that to you! Thank you for the compliments ❤ yes, Nicki/Lestat were SO cute and lovely (Anon refers to the Poor and the Dead)
(Armand wasn’t in that fic, so I’m not sure in what context you’re referring to him. I did have him being quite a little bitch in my other recent fic that I did w/ @vampchronfic, Hunting in a Walmart, and yes, I think his beauty helps him get away w/ a lot of questionable behavior!)
Idk what would have happened if Nicki hadn’t “gone insane,” but also if Lestat hadn’t been kidnapped that night ;A; Nicki always seemed to have that darkness in him. Would Lestat have been medication enough to keep Nicki… I hesitate to use the word “sane” here, or “happy,” but would Lestat have been enough to make life seem worth living for Nicki?
There is some fanon that Nicki suffered from mental illness, and idk if Lestat was really equipped to handle the role of being a support and caregiver to someone who might have needed alot more than that *cries forever for Nicki*
Ezra has this sweet mischevious/devilish quality that’s more Nicolas than Louis to me, but @thelionscrimsonclaws liked Ezra as Louis on this post.
I haven’t seen this movie but I should. Ezra looks great in period costume. I saw him in We Need to Talk About Kevin, he was gr9! I’d screentest him for Nicki.
^Lookit this sassy trying-not-to-smile smile ;D
^This little flash of smile…
^Idk what to call this except I really like it…
^”TF U SAY ABOUT LESTAT” He bout to smack a bitch.
(ooc; Not sure how serious you are, but, Reminder: if you have already taken something or done something to harm yourself please call 911. If you haven’t done anything and if you’re thinking about suicide, please talk to the suicide hotline 1-800-273-TALK (8255) in the U.S., to find a suicide helpline outside the U.S., visit IASP or Suicide.org. Please read Suicide Help.)
♛My dear, I’m so sorry to read this message. My heart aches for you.
There are times when yes, the loneliness overtakes me. I do feel emptiness at times, moreso in those times I was betrayed by the ones closest to me. Not to revisit that… but the emptiness you are describing seems to be a deeper one than what I experienced. Again, my heart aches for you.
Sometimes solitude is needed, just to get to know myself once again, so that I can return to my loved ones.
Because that’s really the answer, at least for me, time spent with your loved ones has healing properties. Do you have any pets? Or know anyone who does? I’ve found that rolling around with a sizable dog (or several!) can also cure me of many of these gutwrenching feelings, those insidious negative voices that creep in. The healing power of dog cuddles may not be complete but it is still substantial.
If you don’t have anyone you can go to, there are professionals out there who can help. One group is called the
Samaritans.
The Dark Gift is not, generally, a quick fix. You bring yourself with you, and all your own experiences, all your own baggage. It enhances who you already are, for better or worse. I found that out with my beloved Nicki. Knowing what I know now about him, would I still give him the Dark Gift? I desperately want to say yes, but I don’t think it “fixed” him. Not by a long shot. It made him into another version of himself. Purified him. It seemed to release him from his life-long act of being a civilized person, which he detested.
In the absence of everything else I’ve suggested, one other cure: Stories. Read. Watch movies. Listen to music. Eat your favorite foods. Read my first book again, and see how I dealt with obstacle after obstacle, take inspiration from my example. Or, and I can’t believe I’m suggesting this: read Louis’ book. Know that he experienced similar feelings to yours. He survived it.
You are not alone. Get the help you need, or cure yourself, or both! Validate yourself if no one else will. Care for yourself as if you were your own best friend. There were so many times when that’s all I could do for myself, for years. Decades, even. If I had given up, at any of those times, I would not be here to offer you this: I survived. So can you.
You are preaching to the choir re: Tom Cruise ;D I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.
^This is one of my favorite production stills of him. He’s just perfect. Menacing, charming, at the edge of reason and also in total control of the scene… but this is largely in his acting and ppl who disliked him may not have given him a chance like AR did (you know, she initially railed against his casting, and after seeing a screening of the film, completely changed her mind and sang his praises).
Ppl argue that he doesn’t look like Lestat, and that’s true, he’s a little vertically challenged and he doesn’t have *~iridescent grey-blue eyes~*, he doesn’t have *~a gorgeous mop of pampered yellow hair.~* The hair and makeup they did for him work with his natural coloring, and they tried going brighter blond, didn’t really mesh well. Ppl also argue about his personal life, and Scientology, all that mess… but I don’t factor that into his performance as Lestat, personally.
But he more than makes up for all that in his acting, imo. He did his homework for the role and put a massive amount of effort into it, you can tell that he loves the character. Tom Cruise re: Lestat:
“I used the books as a reference for me and, y’know, you have to read them, especially Interview with the Vampire, because it’s from Louis’s point of view, you have to read it very carefully to find the clues to who Lestat is, and y’know… his loneliness, and his, his personal… struggle. He recognizes that Louis’ a unique… being, and if he wanted… y’know it’s that whole thing, and Lestat gives him the choice – very clearly – even in the book Lestat gives Louis the choice, uh, and that’s something I felt very strongly about… and when Lestat asks Louis, “Do you still want death? Or have you tasted it enough?” He’s really asking Louis:
“Do you still wanna die? I mean, now you know, you’ve come close to death, is this what you want?”
Re: Baby Jenks – Yeah I liked her alot, too! The way her narrative was written was refreshing, unlike any canon before it. Concisely stated but rich and believable backstory. She deserved to have more screentime. More fanart of her would be gr9!
Baby Jenks, like Nicolas, and a few other characters w/ less “screentime” in VC… it was surprising to me when ppl started digging them up and loving them, but I’ve come to realize that these are characters that:
A) still have some blank slate left, so fans can draw their own headcanons on them; and,
B) (part 1) seem to be characters that this generation relate to more. Nicolas practically has a canon mental illness, and he suffers for it. Ppl saw themselves in him and the representation felt good, that and author recognized their existence, even though he didn’t get a happy ending, and we love characters like that.
B) (part 2) Baby Jenks didn’t get a treasure chest of money and jewels or a frickin’ castle when she was turned; she had a biker gang and was so much richer bc she wasn’t alone! Her backstory was briefly sketched, but it was in powerful strokes; she was a BAMF in her own way, refusing to go quietly into that good night. And that’s inspiring, and we love characters like that.
When he woke up, it was with a smile. Already unsettling enough, but he found that the smile didn’t leave so easily either. His head was always full of too many thoughts, but today was different. It was his heart that was full and his head seemed unable to hold on to anything.
Back in Paris, Nicolas had friends who seemingly fell deeply in love with someone new every week and he’d always felt removed from it all, looking on with a sarcastic sneer and that roll of his eyes that was almost as feared as the sharpness of his tongue.
What would they say if they could see him now? This wasn’t him. He couldn’t be the one to keep thinking about eyes that seemed to change their shade when passion overtook them, kisses from an all too generous mouth and feeling as if he was still set aflame just from the memory. It was ridiculous.
And who was the cause? A noble pauper, who’d already fucked more than half the girls in the village and then some. No idea of the world, but a laugh that brightened it nonetheless and a head filled with naive nonsense that somehow still showed more intelligence than all his learned friends back in the city. No wonder he was captivated. But did his heart have to beat like this whenever he thought of him?
Everything else faded into the background, the whole day and whoever he had to talk to, he barely paid any attention to it. He couldn’t focus on eating, couldn’t focus on a single thing, even the violin only distracted him for moments at the time, because his fingers hadn’t yet learned how to dance to the music that played within him now.
By the time it was dark, he still had no idea what to think and was getting a bit too much of an idea about what he felt. He sat in his chair, one knee drawn up to his chest, kicking his other foot against the chair’s legs. He was ridiculous.
Yet when he heard the sound of pebbles being thrown against his window, it only took him a moment to get up and open it up. He wasn’t surprised to see Lestat standing downstairs, as if he’d expected to see him there. As if they had arranged for it.
“Do you want to come down and go on with our Conversation?”
Nicolas didn’t hesitate. He gave no reply and simply closed the window, but only to throw on his coat, grab his violin and literally run down the stairs as he hadn’t done since he was a young boy. There had been no reply needed. The smile was back and it said it all.
The door fell shut behind him and he was already by Lestat’s side, hoping that his eyes didn’t give it all away, yet putting a hand on his hip at the same time. Oh, to hell with it all.
I-want-my-IWTV 