[Transcribed as he watched it][SPOILER ALERTS]

• ♛Ooooh I love a packed theatre! THE EXCITEMENT IS MORE PALPABLE THAN THE REEK OF POPPED CORN AND THIS SLUDGE PEOPLE CURRENTLY CALL CHEESE.

• [Trailer for Krampus] The audience is all laughing at this horror trailer, I don’t think we’re supposed to be laughing, I think it’s meant to be terrifying but it’s too funny to be scary! 10/10 would watch this trailer again, take note.

• [Trailer for the new Frankenstein movie] I’ve created a monster or two in my time, too, DON’T JUDGE PPL FOR MAKING A MONSTER NOW AND THEN *frowns* We have our reasons. Write that down.
• He says it needs a love story? MINE IS A LOVE STORY. ALL MY STORIES ARE LOVE STORIES. WHY AREN’T THEY MAKING ANOTHER MOVIE FROM MY BOOKS GDI?
• “What I saw was a dreamer facing defeat.” WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS RAIN ON MY PARADE TOO? I know that feel, Mr. Sharpe. We are the music makers… and we are the dreamers of dreams.
• This girl and I would get along perfectly – laying in bed with good books, luxuriously wrapped in yellow velvet, awww yissss that is a well-spent evening. 

• I CAN DEMO THE WALTZ EUROPEAN STYLE LOUIS GET IN HERE (but maybe not holding a candle, Louis can’t always be trusted around candles and ME AT THE SAME DAMN TIME)

• We should’ve let Claudia have a dog. Maybe a Papillon.
• Charlie Hunnam

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• YELLOW SILK

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  ♥ Write that down.

• Yes let’s go to the POST OFFICE GREAT IDEA FOR A FUN EXCURSION like, wtf? the POST OFFICE IS NOT A FIELD TRIP WORTH DOING. Oh wait, I seem to recall my own fledglings going to the post office JUST TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE AND AWAY FROM ME OCCASIONALLY I AM OFFENDED THAT OFFENDS ME.

• Seeing your lover with someone else hurts, doesn’t it????!!!
• Hoe don’t do it! 
• She did it. Because how could she not?

• My lover’s sister tried to kill me, too. Hurts, doesn’t it????!!!
• The dog is dying! Now I’m actually upset.
• “You’re monsters, both of you!” Where have I heard that before? Now this is hitting too close to home. I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING KEEP TAKING NOTES.
•  You stabbed him iN THE FACE. IN THE FACE!! Rude. What about the groundrules? 

  Rule number 1: No touching of the hair or face… AND THAT’S IT!

• We were ALL LAUGHING AS THOMAS PULLED THE KNIFE OUT. Should we not have been laughing? We are a terribly cruel audience.
• Hissing, incidentally, is an excellent way to stun an opponent in a fight.
• “I heard you the first time.” I’M USING THAT.