dexobsessed:

funny moment from church
coin, coin to distract attention! you smart ass) 

Hundreds rose to their feet before me, hundreds of mouths opening to scream. Giving another shout, I grabbed Gabrielle’s hand and lunged towards them, leaping over the Communion rail. She gave a lovely high-pitched wail, her left hand raised as a claw as I pulled her down the aisle. Everywhere there was panic, men and women clutching for children, shrieking and falling backwards. … I reached into my pockets and showered the marble floor with gold coins.

“The devil throws money! ” someone screeched.

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-I’ve only known Claudia for an hour and a half, but if anything happened to her, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself. 

-Very violent eulogy, I like it.

(insp. Brooklyn Nine-Nine)

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